


I Have lost the Will to Change

by AlexTheShipper



Series: Fics in which Tony will not be pushed around [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Civil War Team Iron Man, Gen, Not Steve Rogers Friendly, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Press and Tabloids, Tony Stark Angst, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, not team Cap friendly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-09
Updated: 2019-03-09
Packaged: 2019-11-14 05:47:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18046670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexTheShipper/pseuds/AlexTheShipper
Summary: The prepared speech is perfect, but Tony isn't sure he's ready to paint a picture of the Avengers as a happy family just yet.





	I Have lost the Will to Change

Tony walks onto stage to a series of flashing lights and shouted questions, smiling at a room full of strangers gathered to listen to him talk. He waves at them, putting on his best show as he climbs onto the stage. When he reaches the podium, the crowd falls mostly silent.

The speech in front of him is perfectly written. He glances down at it fully aware that it’s the result of a two-week long collaboration between three different PR departments. Right now, it would be the easiest thing in the world to read that script. The script that paints the perfect image of a united front, the Avengers reunited. He has to wonder though, is that an image that he wants to paint? Can he afford to do what he would have to do in order to maintain that false image? He honestly isn’t sure.

“Mr. Stark!” A reporter asks, “Why was this press conference called?” He’s not the only one shouting questions at him. So, Tony makes his decision, and raises a hand to quiet the crowd.

“Hello again Everyone, Jerry looking good.” He smiles at the reporter from the times. “How are the kids?” Jerry smiles back at him, offering a thumbs up, but the show must go on. “It’s nice to see you all again, so many familiar faces it’s like a family reunion.” That get’s a small laugh, and he beams at the crowd before stepping away from the podium taking the microphone with him.

“Now, I have an incredibly nice speech all written up, right over there.” He gestures to the podium. “It’s an amazing speech really, fantastic work. It’s probably the speech everyone wants to hear.” Christine smiles at him, and if he didn’t know her better, he might think she looked a little proud. “But, it’s not the speech I’m going to give.”

 _“I am Ironman.” He said, and every camera in the room went off. He hadn’t done it for the fame, he’d done it because he didn’t want to be accountable to SHIELD he wanted to be accountable to the people. That’s why he signed the accords_.

“Honesty is the best policy, right?” He grins at them. “You all know why you’re here, the Avengers are coming back from their little vacation.” He suppresses the sneer that tugs at his lips at the thought of them relaxing in Wakanda while he worked his ass off to clean up the mess that they had made. “But if we’re being honest the two years since the media coined Avengers Civil War, bit dramatic guys really, doesn’t erase what happened.” He walks up to the front of the stage, in full view of the cameras. “We broke up, we fought each other, it was ugly and messy, and it definitely wasn’t fun.”

 _It didn’t take long for his anger to leave him after Steve and Barnes left. Once they were gone the pain set in, the taste of blood in his mouth, the feeling of his chest being crushed and cut each time he took a breath. It was excruciating. And then the cold started to seep in_.

“Not fun at all, but now, they’re coming home, and I’m glad they are. I am.” The words feel hollow even to his own ears. “The Avengers are meant to protect the planet, and that is what they want to do. They have the power to do it, and I’m glad they’re back here protecting us, protecting you. They’ll make my job a lot easier.” He admits, and it’s no secret ironman has been stretched thin since the Avengers left.

“That’s professional, what about on a personal level?” Christine calls, never one to stay silent during a press conference. He offers her a sad smile.

“On a personal level? I don’t really know how to feel, if I’m being honest. Did I miss them? Absolutely. I thought they were my friends, my family almost. Do I want to see them? No, not really. They hurt me, they hurt my friends.”

 _Rhodey’s suit went dark and then he was tumbling through the air and something dark welled up in Tony’s chest as he pushed the suit to it’s limits trying to catch him. That something dark threatened to consume him in the moment that Rhodey hit the ground_.

“A lot of trust was lost between us, and I’m not sure that trust can ever be gained back.” Tony admits, partially to the press, and partially to himself. “I’m sure some of them still blame me for this whole thing, I’m sure they’re still mad and expecting an apology.” He scoffs at the thought. “Truthfully though, as much as we all like to pretend I’m heartless the avengers broke my heart.”

_Steve Rogers loomed over him, shield held high, and then it was coming down and there was nothing Tony could do, he could practically feel it crushing his neck, and then Steve shifted, slammed the shield into his chest, drove the air from his lung, destroyed the arc reactor._

“So, I’m afraid the Avengers Reunion Tour will have to wait.” Most likely forever. “I am glad they’re coming back, for the sake of earth. We may need them. And if one day the world needs us, fighting side by side, then we will. Until that day comes though, I’ll be honest and say I have no desire to be in the same building as them.”

“Can you really work with them? You said yourself you don’t trust them.” A reporter calls out, he doesn’t really recognize her.

“Of course, people work with others they don’t trust every day. I can put aside my issues for the sake of the world, I am capable of being a professional after all.” He winks at the reporters, getting a few laughs most likely as they think of one of his many drunken mistakes. “Ironman can and will work with the Avengers if absolutely necessary, but Tony Stark, well, I’m afraid I don’t want anything to do with the Avengers. They may be good people, with good intentions, but they also hurt me and I’m not willing to pretend that never happened.”  He waves the crowd before turning to leave cameras flashing in his wake.  


End file.
